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Cracks & Crevices

May 31, 2010

Spiraling stars, star trail

Or Crevasses. Which is one of my favorite words (especially after the movie “Touching the Void”) but anyway…

I have a new post I was trying to work on but blah. I can’t seem to finish my thoughts or get them straightened out. I’ll hopefully post it soon if not right along this one but while I was working on it I happened to spot some jottings in my journal that seemed to fit.

November 14, 2009

I wish I could stop looking for the answers…

…I’m just some where caught in this space between November and December

[I] keep thinking about how I used to wander around looking at all the cracks and crevices, wondering what they would be like if I no longer filled them.

I wasn’t sure what I meant by that when I first re-read it but, now after thinking on this other post I think I remember what this is about.  At first I was reading it kind of too literally lol! Which sort of makes sense because at my mom’s house my brother and I made our “mark” almost everywhere.  It’s been funny to stumble upon our writing or initials all these years later.  That’s not what I meant though, ha! Me and my silly brain. Even thought these are pretty damn depressing I just like them for some reason. Maybe because I do kind of picture that literally still and I kind of drift of and think about everyone’s life in that imagery. The things we all seep into…blah blah anyway…

Here is another one I wrote not long ago, I’d like to keep working on it and turn it into something more though I think:

May 24, 2010

When I was twelve I vanished into thin air. Just all of a sudden one day I no longer existed.  Life filled in around me. I came and went, I watched it all pass by. No one noticed when I returned.

I disappeared again when I was 18. I remember sitting listening to my friends laugh and my instructor drone on about the [fine art] of photography, as the dark clouds swept in over me.  The darkness filled every crevice until I found myself spiraling downward in a vast wasteland of stars. Finally all the stars went out and I found myself lying in a cozy bed of blackness.

I don’t remember when I returned but, I suppose I did…

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